Hey Dan

“We must not confuse dissent with disloyalty, We must remember always that accusation is not proof, and that conviction depends upon evidence and due process of law.

We will not walk in fear, one of another. We will not be driven by fear into an age of unreason, if we dig deep in our history and our doctrine, and remember that we are not descended from fearful men, not from men who feared to write, to speak, to associate, and to defend causes that were for the moment unpopular...

…and so good night, and good luck. ”

Edward R. Murrow - 1954

Posted by Dan at 08:45 AM | Permalink

I have expressed my emotions to myself in a number of ways. It helps me cope with a set of emotions that are sometimes very broken. What I mean by expressing my emotions to myself is that I come up with a visual image in my head, an analogy of what my brain is feeling. I say my brain and not me because sometimes it is just my brain and reality has nothing to do with what is going on in there. Over that last couple of months my analogy is a highway.

I feel like my emotions are driving on a lonely highway at night. The scene is complete with darkness being pushed back by headlights exposing a dotted line in the gloom. There is this feeling when you look off into the darkness at the side of the road that the sadness is very close. I can make it seem more distant by going faster. The faster I go, the more exciting the place I am feels. Sometimes racing is just about pushing yourself to go faster.

This summer I kept my normal July mopes at bay with this image. Like I said, life is good. This is just inside my head, a lost highway inside my head.

Posted by Dan at 10:33 PM | Permalink | Comments (2)

As a guy, I can reconstruct my life with t-shirts. Digging down in my drawer on Sunday it accrued to me that the days of my life were laying in front of me. Vacations, hobbies, jobs, even the like of the beer, music and movies I like all told in t-shirts.

On the top of the stack are the shinny new t-shirts. These get wore more and are in much better shape. These include t-shirts from the Rouge Brewing Company, trips to Oregon and St. Coix and a couple of new shirts from work.

As you dig down in the pile I find haunted house shirts, faire shirts and Warhammer shirts. This layer also has shirts from Dean’s work and shirts from Netier, Microsoft and Embedded Software conferences. The next archeological layer includes youth ministry shirts, Zoo shirts and shirts from plays I was in.

The last layers far underneath the point where laundry must happen are the ancient ones. This includes a Smiths shirt signed by two cute girls at a club in Portland. There is an old tie-dye shirt bought at a Fred Myer for going to the coast on a day I should have been in high school. It was all there stacked like sedentary rock was my life so far.

Posted by Dan at 07:42 AM | Permalink | Comments (2)

Did anyone else see that Keith Richards was threatened with a $95 fine for smoking? Yes, that was smoking a cigarette. Not trashing a hotel or some exotic drug, no fined for lighting up. Where has all the rock and roll gone? But the way Keith you kick every illegal drug know to man, you’re like a thousand years old… time to get the patch or something.

Posted by Dan at 07:40 AM | Permalink

I have this attitude about generosity that seems to though people. My attitude is, be generous with people when you can. How this works for me is that when it really does not matter to me I make generous offers.

Take cars, I drive them until they are dead. It is normal for me to drive a car well beyond the 200K mark. When I am done with them they are not great trade-ins. I would get maybe $500 for most cars I would sell. $500 is a lot of money, but when you are talking about the value of a trade-in, not so much. It really does not matter. Therefore, I more in favor of giving them a way to people I know need a car.

I will always fight over who gets the check at lunch. To me it is a game with rules and everything. I am doing well enough to know that even if I buy lunch for someone, I am going to make rent. There were times in my life that was not the case. Therefore now, I fight over the check. To me it is more fun playing this game then worrying about it.

Last week one of the people in my government class sent out an email asking if anyone had a government book they wanted to sell. They have a brother and a couple of friends that are taking the class. I sent an email back saying that I have one and it is up for grabs for free. I told them the choice is between the book sitting on my self collecting dust and going to a new home. The new home makes me happy. They do not understand why giving a book away would make me happy.

There is this concept about generosity. One of the best ways to give is freely to someone who is not asking, but needs. This is the kind that brightens my day.

Posted by Dan at 04:28 PM | Permalink | Comments (4)

Sometimes getting to the end of a good court ruling is a lot like getting to the end of a good book.

As Justice Warren wrote in U.S. v. Robel, 389 U.S. 258 (1967):
Implicit in the term ‘national defense’ is the notion of defending
those values and ideas which set this Nation apart. . . . It would
indeed be ironic if, in the name of national defense, we would
sanction the subversion of . . . those liberties . . . which makes the
defense of the Nation worthwhile.

Anna Diggs Taylor in ruling that the NSA's warrentless wiretap program is unconstitutional.

Posted by Dan at 02:52 PM | Permalink

After spending a couple of days sightseeing on the mall in DC, I have a couple of observations. The first is there is something really cool about seeing the actual Constitution. It is on display at the National Archives. I didn’t think it would be that cool to see it. It seems like the kind of thing they make you do in grade school. ‘Today, kids we are going to see the Constitution.’ But it was not like that. Ok, it kind of was. But it still was really cool. I did want to run down the street a couple of blocks and let them know I found the Bill of Rights, if they were looking for it.

Second, in two days of hanging out around the national mall, I heard a couple of dozen languages. These included Russian, Spanish, Mandarin, French, at least two African dialects, a couple of Slovak and a handful I could not place. I am guessing most if not all of them visiting our country. They came to DC to see the Smithsonian and take their picture in front of the Capital. They all seemed in awe of this city, like they were walking around Camelot. We have missed that vision of ourselves.

Last, our government is obsessed with security currently, mostly its own. No, I am not just talking about the picture thing. In peoples day to day lives here in DC, government security is a reality that they live with. I was spoken to by five DC police officers in less then six hours spent on the mall. All of these conversations were started by DC police officers. All but one was them giving me information about where I was allowed to walk or things I was not allowed to do. Now think about that, I walked around the mall on the path twice and went to the Smithsonian and National Archives. These are not high danger activities.

This is all of DC that I can take. Right now, I am really happy that I am home.

Posted by Dan at 09:15 PM | Permalink

My adventure in DC has been an interesting trip so far. I bought a metro pass and have met some strange people.

There was this one guy on the first day the thought the DC metro rail authority was out to ruin his day. Seriously, he thought they planned their action to maximize the amount they would annoy him. He kind of latched on to me at a station and would not go away. Oddly he was not really creepy, more just geekier, in that conspiracy theory kind of way. He kept checking the GPS nav system on his phone. It was the type that keeps telling you “turn right 500 yards.” That is what it kept doing while he was riding on the metro rail… on the metro rail. Like he could turn right in 500 yards.

Today a little old italian lady from DC sat next to me and flirted the whole trip. She was with her daughter and son-in-law who were headed back from a trip. I got to hear all about where she had work and how it was just like where I work. She ask me if I was married and seemed a little put out to hear the news. When I ask where her accent was from instead of telling me Italy or the town she said “I from Romeo and Juliet.” She expected me to know where that was. She patted my arm when I got the answer correct (Verona). Her stop was the one before mine. As she got up she congratulated me again on being married and rejoined her group like I was nothing to her.

I had a strange and mildly heated conversation with a DC policeman. Apparently it is illegal to take pictures of federal buildings. Yes I got caught taking a picture of a federal building. The sunset was reflecting in the glass windows of the building next the White House and I took a picture. This is when the policeman walked up and told “you should watch yourself that is a $500 ticket.” Yes, they told me to watch myself. I had a moment of WTFO! Fortunately the moment passed and I realized I was talking to a police officer who might take their job seriously. This might not be a good time to point out the irony of this it being a code red or whatever alert and me standing within sight of where the leaded of the “free” (with proper permit only) world. I was standing about 200 yard from a pack of 30+ tourist taking pictures of the White House. I tired to find the law, but every time I google it to look I think I might be monitored by satellite or the metro rail or somebody. This is DC after all!

Posted by Dan at 11:42 PM | Permalink | Comments (3)

I had a date with K tonight. With school and everything it had been awhile since we had a chance to have a date. We went out to dinner and the bookstore then home to watch a sappy movie. We are such geeks in love. I love my wife.

Tomorrow morning I fly out to DC for work. I do not mind traveling for work. I do hate being away from home. I am flying out a day early to see if I can get some time to see DC. All the times I been there I have never really had a chance to sightsee.

Posted by Dan at 11:25 PM | Permalink | Comments (3)

A Quick update on government II class and the mock-trial, I got second place in best witness category. The judges were 20 members of the government I class. Reading the comments on the judging sheet, most of them caught the moment when I contradicted my own story. They gave me high marks for knowledge of my part and ability to handle the defense cross examination. Oh yeah and I made an A in the class. Go me!

edit: C++ just posted grades... make that 2 A's for summer semester!

Posted by Dan at 10:15 AM | Permalink | Comments (1)

U.S.: Airline terror plot 'close to execution'

WASHINGTON (CNN) -- Terrorists were in the final stages of planning to blow up planes heading to the United States, U.S. Homeland Security Secretary Michael Chertoff said Thursday. The U.S. raised the terror threat level to "severe" for all flights leaving Britain for the United States. Britain raised its alert level to "critical."

Yesterday, I found out that I need to be in DC for meetings Tuesday and Wednesday. I know this is the world I live in now. The flight I am taking is not from Heathrow to America. I know people in several parts of the world live with worse then this everyday. My flight is safe and I will be alright. But it is weird to think that people are trying to kill people like me to get news headlines.

Edit:

While researching current restrictions on carrying on my ipod, I came across this...

Parachutes and Security Screening

"You may bring skydiving rigs with and without Automatic Activation Devices (AAD) as carry-on or checked luggage."

I not sure if this makes me feel better or worse.

Posted by Dan at 09:46 AM | Permalink | Comments (1)

Summer semester is DONE! I now have 20 glorious days before fall semester starts. The idea of taking one more class this fall still is rolling around in my brain. I could take a photography class and learn how the whole camera thing works. Right now I enrolled for a math class, Java II and public speaking. The real question is how much work is that going to be. If Java and math turn out to take a great deal of homework then I do not have time.

Last night was the mock-trial which was the final for Government class. It was both the most fun final I have ever had and one of the hardest. At the beginning of the semester we were given a mock-up of a case. It had witness depositions, physical evidence, applicable case law and the criminal charges of a fictitious case. One day one the class was split into defense and prosecution.

I was placed on the prosecution. The grade for our final was based on how well we did prosecuting the case. We selected people to play witnesses and lawyers. Lawyers had to argue the case and witnesses had to help their side without impeaching themselves. The way the case was written this was not a easy task. The case was written specialty to for mock-trial tournaments. (I had no idea there where such things.)

My job was one of the two team captains and to play the arresting officer in this kidnapping case. As the prosecution the deck was stacked ageist us. Let’s just say the word ‘reasonable doubt’ would come up a couple of times. As the prosecutions lead off witness I was going to take a beating from the defense. I knew this going in.

I have never spent this much time studying for any final. By last night I had read the whole case (70+ pages) dozens of time. I had gone through 4 or 5 dry runs of both my direct and cross examination testimony. I had retyped every word of my deposition 3 times. I barrowed books from a friends and former policeman and picked his brain about testifying. Walking in last night I still wished I had gone over the whole case just one more time. That changed to wishing I had drop the class when the defense made their opening remarks. Their defense hinged on two things, one another suspect who was not going to be put on the stand and shoddy police work (me).

It started off alright. The guy playing the prosecution lawyer for my direct testimony stood up call me to the stand. We got half way though the night of the crime without anything going wrong and then it happened. The blank look went across the lawyer’s face. His eyes got that panicked “HELP ME” look. He reached for his note to find where he should be, but his notes where not there. He had forgotten them. He was a lawyer without notes. He was about to fail a final exam and I was along for the ride.

The next couple minutes where painful for everyone in the room. He did get a hold of someone’s notes, but they were incomplete and out of order. The downside was that about half our case sat in my head and no-one was going to help get it into the record. The upside was that I was about to face the defense who had hinged their case on me and I had nothing to loose at this point.

The defense lawyer who cross examined me was very good. He had a plan and was going to stick to the plan. I was not going to stick to the plan. My job at this point was to get as much of our case in as testimony to the cross examination questions as possible. To keep witnesses form doing this in cross they ask yes or no questions. For those of you who have never played this game it is called “yes and.”

In the end we failed to get a conviction. The defense did a great job. The amazing part is that in the tournament score they only won by 2 points in a very high scoring match. This would be like loosing 5 to 4 in a hokey game where you goalie did not show for half the game. It was all about offense. I kept from impeaching myself (barely) and we got at least one of the defense witnesses to impeach themselves. In the end it was the second suspect that clichéd it for the jury.

I am very proud of my teammates and the other team. We both play very hard and after the final laughed with each other. There was even beer.

Posted by Dan at 04:28 PM | Permalink | Comments (4)

I have a slight propensity to make radical statements. This is a failing of mine. I should work on this at some point. This point will not be today. This is my current favorite heated debate starter:

Higher gas prices make me happy. Gas at $2 a gallon brightens my day. I do not work for or own any oil company stock. It is because, the higher gas prices go, the greater the benefit of conservation.

We have had reliable electric cars for more then ten years. Hybrids and bio-diesel are available today. The resistance to adopting these clearer technologies is cheap fossil fuel. Bio-diesel cost about $50 a barrel to produce. When gas goes above $60 a barrel then Bio-diesel becomes economically viable. Better yet, if gas prices went above $4 a gallon, hybrids become cost effective. Who knows, at $5 a gallon we could get quality public transportation. At $7 a gallon we could have high speed rail.

I understand that our economy will tank at some point. The reason I not really worried about keeping that from happening is that it is going to happen either way. So let’s force the hand of fate and raise taxes on gas by $4 a gallon. Say good bye to traffic jams, hello high speed rail from here to Las Vegas!

There is a slight chance that whole Mad Max/Road Warrior thing could happen…

Posted by Dan at 03:24 PM | Permalink | Comments (1)

With one week left in the summer session, I can see free time for a couple of days. In the next week I have only one class to attend. My final project is due, I have one final to take at some point and I have a mock trial to get ready for. That means a good deal of studying this weekend.

The summer session has taken more of my time then I thought it would. Although I must admit not in the way I thought. I had very little text to read. I read the assigned chapter before classes started for both government and intro to C++. What has taken a good deal of time is the classes themselves. Being in class Monday through Thursday night until after 9 or 10 is a big burden of time. It has worked out to 14 hours of class a week.

Much of my life has been on hold due to both working more hours and classes. Getting the new site up took longer then I had plan because I had to do it after 10 pm.

Looking at next semester I am taking three classes, a java class, a math class and speech. I have time to take one more class, but the odds of me being burned out at the end are high. What is driving me to take another class is that I will in fact be a sophomore by this fall. If I could take four classes a semester instead I would be able to finish my bachelors’ degree in three or four years. That would mean four classes a semester and two in the summer. That would mean a masters degree could be a achievable dream before I am 45.

The question is how much can I do without burring out, hurting my marriage or having a psychotic episode. The time will come soon when I will have to decide what hobbies to abandon. I think Faire is safe, but painting has really lagged and so has filming.

Posted by Dan at 11:24 AM | Permalink | Comments (2)

On my resent trip to Oregon I had an amazing conversation with an old friend. His name is Ron Petty he plays drums in the band Phamous Phaces. He also owns the music store where my Mom does the books. The conversation involved why his band travels from Oregon to Europe to play gigs. His answer to this question of frequent flier miles verses sleep is cable TV.

You see, after weeks of living in a hotel in Liverpool while playing gigs in clubs there it hit him. There is nothing on cable there. Oh sure we love BBC here, but apparently in England it stinks. With nothing on TV people are forced to leave their homes and walk down to the local pub have a pint and listen to a band. The music scene is great there, so much so that the import bands. Take the town he lives in as the other extreme. It has great cable and only one bar left that has live music. In fact few bars at all are left.

Ron is also what some may call politically opinionated. He like me is not a great fan of our current political playing field. The problem? You guest it! Too much on Cable TV. People must not be watching the news. If they were, they would run into the streets and demand things be changed.

So I have a new plan… slowly reduce the number of good shows on cable TV until live music and political awareness improves. I tell you some time the answers are just right there. Thanks Ron, hang in there.

you can find out more about Ron and Phamous Phaces at www.phamousphaces.com

Posted by Dan at 06:51 PM | Permalink | Comments (4)

Still working on the design... more fun soon.

Posted by Dan at 04:41 PM | Permalink